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Let Girls Say No

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On May 18, 2018, a high schooler opened fire at Sante Fe High School killing 10 people. One of the first people to die was Shana Fisher, a 16 year old who had endured four months of problems with the shooter. Fisher’s mother claimed that the shooter had pestered her repeatedly to go out with him, to which Fisher responded “no” everytime. Finally, Fisher told him to cut it out in front of the whole class. A few days later, he would kill Fisher and nine other people. A girl said the simple word “no” to a boy and she gets murdered for it. Of course, being rejected wasn’t the sole reason for a boy to go on a shooting rampage, but it shows something that is all too real: boys can’t take the word no. Let girls be able to say no without having to be punished for it. Teach boys to understand what the word no means.

The end of the year means promposals, which also means people will be pressured to give a desirable answer. Promposal season can be the most exciting or the most dreadful for girls. We feel like we’re obligated to say yes because out of fear of what others might think if we reject the proposal. Agreeing to go to prom with someone we don’t particularly like is seen as a more viable option than just telling them no. Whenever I hear that someone rejected a guy’s proposal, the first response I hear is “wow she’s so mean” or “that’s messed up.” No one bothers to to say how uncomfortable they[girls] must feel when being pressured to go out with a guy. It’s understandable when a boy asks a girl he knows is going to say yes, that way there is no pressure on either person to do something they don’t want to do. But if a boy wants to ask a girl, who he isn’t too sure will say yes, let me give a piece of advice, don’t do it. Find someone that wants to go with you and leave the poor girl alone.

I know the dread I feel when it’s dance season, and boys are looking for dates. In the past when I expressed disinterest in agreeing to go out with a boy, others, including some of my friends, respond “don’t be so mean” or “just say yes to him.” We shouldn’t have to feel obligated to go to a dance with a boy just because it will make him feel better. It’s not a girl’s job to sacrifice her fun at a dance just to please a boy. Stop making girls feel like they have some duty to go out with boys. Some girls at school joke about not even showing up to school just to avoid getting asked and having to say no. Girls shouldn’t have to feel like they can’t get an education just because they feel like they don’t have any other option besides saying no.

A girl shouldn’t feel obligated to say yes to boy just because he really likes her and he’ll “feel bad.” Now obviously, no one should be harsh when rejecting someone, that’s just mean. But, when a guy simply will not leave a girl alone, she has every right to shut him down as she chooses. Making girls say yes enforces the notion that a boy’s feelings and desires are more important than girls’. Any sense of equality is thrown out the window when a girl is made to feel like she isn’t free to respond how she pleases.

So listen here boys, lose that sense of self-entitlement. Girls are not obligated to go out with you. When a girl says no, she doesn’t mean that she wants you to continuously ask her again and again. The first time she tells you no, drop it and leave her alone. Girls don’t owe you anything, so quit it with that ego and just go to prom alone.

About the Writer
Kassy Ortega, OP/ED Editor

Grade: 12

Most passionate about: Dogs, Leonardo Dicaprio, and film

Teletubby that relates to you most: Tinky Winky

Favorite book: Somehow I...

1 Comment

One Response to “Let Girls Say No”

  1. Mr. Francisco on September 27th, 2018 8:46 am

    A girl saying no then getting shot along with ten other students, pathetic. Your evidence is as worth as saying a cow abandoned its cattle. Did the cattle die? Did it become ill? Did it fall? There’s so many aspects in this occurrence(s), and one being having a close relationship. It’s probably the girl’s fault for being too intimate, causing both epicurean lovers to even cause dog play. Girls and boys, we both have problems and that’s reliving the stereotype, get out the cave. (Cave of Allegory)

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